Suffering Domestic Violence.

Domestic Abuse: Getting Help and Understanding Your Options

Leaving an abusive relationship can be difficult and frightening. Many victims feel trapped, ashamed, responsible for the relationship, worried about children, concerned about money, or afraid that the abuse will get worse if they try to leave.

Domestic abuse is never the victim's fault. Help is available, and nobody should have to live in fear, violence, intimidation or control.

If You Are in Immediate Danger

If you are in immediate danger, call 999. If you cannot speak safely, follow the emergency operator's instructions.

If you need confidential support about domestic abuse, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is available 24 hours a day on 0808 2000 247.

What Is Domestic Abuse?

Domestic abuse is not limited to physical violence. It can include emotional abuse, psychological abuse, sexual abuse, controlling behaviour, coercive behaviour, economic abuse, threats, intimidation, harassment, stalking and isolation.

Abuse may happen between partners, ex-partners or family members. It can affect women, men, children, older people, disabled people, LGBTQ+ people and people from any background.

Physical Abuse

Physical abuse can include hitting, slapping, pushing, choking, kicking, burning, restraining, throwing objects, damaging property, using weapons or threatening physical harm.

Even if physical violence has happened only once, it should be taken seriously. Abuse often escalates over time.

Emotional and Psychological Abuse

Emotional abuse can include humiliation, insults, blame, threats, constant criticism, gaslighting, intimidation, isolation from friends or family, and making someone feel worthless or afraid.

Psychological abuse can be extremely damaging even where there are no visible injuries. It can make it harder for the victim to recognise what is happening or ask for help.

Coercive and Controlling Behaviour

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour used to dominate, frighten or control another person. It can include monitoring movements, checking phones, controlling clothing, restricting contact with others, using jealousy as control, threatening self-harm, or making the victim feel they cannot make decisions freely.

Controlling or coercive behaviour in an intimate or family relationship can be a criminal offence.

Economic Abuse

Economic abuse can include controlling access to money, taking wages or benefits, preventing someone from working, building up debts in their name, restricting access to bank accounts, or using financial dependence to stop someone leaving.

Financial concerns are a common reason people feel unable to leave. Specialist domestic abuse services, housing teams, benefits advisers and solicitors may be able to help.

Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse includes any sexual activity without consent. Being in a relationship or marriage does not remove the need for consent.

If you have experienced rape, sexual assault or sexual abuse, you can contact Rape Crisis England & Wales on 0808 500 2222 for free, confidential support. :contentReference[oaicite:1]{index=1}

Common Reasons Victims Stay

Victims may stay because they fear further violence, worry about children, have no safe accommodation, lack money, feel isolated, hope the relationship will improve, fear not being believed, or worry about immigration, housing or family consequences.

These concerns are real. Leaving can be a high-risk time, so it is usually safer to seek support and make a safety plan rather than act alone.

Speaking to Someone You Trust

Speaking to a trusted friend, relative, GP, teacher, employer or support worker can be an important first step. However, people close to you may not always understand the risks or the safest way to help.

Specialist domestic abuse services can help assess risk, plan safely and explain options without pressuring you to take steps before you are ready.

Safety Planning

A safety plan can help you prepare for an emergency or plan to leave safely. This may include keeping important documents accessible, setting aside emergency money, packing essentials, identifying a safe place to go, telling a trusted person, and planning how to leave with children or pets.

It may also include changing passwords, checking location sharing, reviewing smart devices, securing bank accounts, and using safe methods of communication.

Technology and Online Abuse

Abusers may use technology to monitor, track or control someone. This can include phone tracking, spyware, shared cloud accounts, smart doorbells, vehicle trackers, social media, banking apps, email access or smart home devices.

If you think your devices are being monitored, seek advice before changing settings that could increase risk. Use a safe device or a trusted person's phone where possible.

Children and Domestic Abuse

Children can be harmed by seeing, hearing or experiencing domestic abuse. An abuser may also use them to continue control after separation.

If children are at risk, urgent advice should be sought. Support may be available from police, children's services, schools, health professionals, domestic abuse services and family solicitors.

Housing and Safe Accommodation

You may be able to access refuge accommodation, emergency housing, homelessness support, sanctuary schemes or other safety measures. Local councils have duties in some domestic abuse and homelessness situations.

If you are worried about leaving the family home, rent, mortgage payments, tenancy rights or where you and your children will live, take advice from a domestic abuse service, housing adviser or solicitor.

Legal Protection

Legal protection may be available through non-molestation orders, occupation orders, restraining orders, police bail conditions, Domestic Violence Protection Orders, Domestic Abuse Protection Orders where available, and other safeguarding measures.

A non-molestation order can protect against threats, harassment, violence and unwanted contact. An occupation order can regulate who can live in or enter the home.

Clare’s Law

Clare's Law, formally known as the Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme, allows people to ask the police whether a partner or ex-partner has a history of domestic abuse or violent offending.

The police can also proactively disclose information when they believe someone may be at risk. Clare's Law is an information disclosure scheme, not an emergency protection order.

Reporting to the Police

You can report domestic abuse to the police. In an emergency, call 999. For non-emergency police contact, call 101 or use the relevant police force's online reporting service.

If you are unsure whether to report, a domestic abuse support service can explain options and help you consider safety, evidence and possible next steps.

Useful Support Contacts

The National Domestic Abuse Helpline is available 24 hours a day on 0808 2000 247.

Men's Advice Line provides confidential support for male victims of domestic abuse and those supporting them.

Rape Crisis England & Wales provides a 24-hour rape and sexual abuse support line on 0808 500 2222.

Victim Support provides a free 24-hour support line on 08 08 16 89 111 for people affected by crime.

Samaritans can be contacted free at any time on 116 123 if you need to talk.

Shelter can provide housing advice, including where domestic abuse affects housing or homelessness rights.

If You Are Supporting Someone Else

If someone tells you they are being abused, listen without judgment. Do not pressure them to leave immediately; confront the abuser or take control of the situation. This can increase the risk.

Encourage them to contact a specialist domestic abuse service, help them make safe calls if they ask, and support their decisions. In an emergency, call 999.

When Legal Advice May Be Needed

Legal advice may be needed where there is domestic abuse, threats, harassment, stalking, child arrangements, housing issues, divorce, financial control, immigration concerns, forced marriage, protective orders or police involvement.

A solicitor can advise on injunctions, non-molestation orders, occupation orders, child arrangements, divorce, financial remedies, housing rights, evidence, legal aid and emergency court applications.

Current Position

Domestic abuse can include physical, emotional, psychological, sexual, controlling, coercive and economic abuse. The Law recognises that abuse is not limited to physical violence.

If there is immediate danger, call 999. If you need confidential support, contact the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or speak to a specialist domestic abuse service. Help is available, and support can be planned safely.

Disclaimer

Solicitors.com is not a firm of solicitors and does not provide legal advice, emergency assistance or domestic abuse support services. The information on this page is for general guidance only. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for advice from a regulated solicitor, the police, a local authority, a medical professional, or a specialist domestic abuse service. Domestic abuse law, protective order procedures and support services can change, and how the Law applies will depend on the facts of each case.

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